Hold On

Give me a time and a place and I'll be there, I swear
I'm falling from the front to the back of your mind
Let's write this one again {with} words we never say
Even just pretend if it's the only way
Hold on to...

Say what you have been meaning to
And be what you have been dreaming to
Say what you have been meaning to

-from "Hold On" by Spitalfield

Change coming? Perhaps. I feel it. I think it's the good kind... I hope I'm not disappointed.

Working hard. Even though some might not notice, it'll pay off in the long run. Yes, I truly believe that. I'm not the most talented out there, but I work hard. 'Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard."

Things are looking up.

Stream of consciousness?  Totally.

That's my update!

The Pursuit of Happiness

I had a post one or two months ago about songs on albums I had recently purchased with the word 'happy' in the title. A couple of weeks ago I purchased This Providence's self titled CD. Their first album was really good, and their third one came out in March. The third one, Who Are You Now?, is really good and catchy as well. I remember not liking what I heard from their second one when it was released, but I decided to buy it. 

The last two songs, The Pursuit of Happiness: The 1st Movement and The Pursuit of Happiness: The 2nd Movement, have 'happy' in the title which got me thinking about my previous post. The 1st Movement is better than the 2nd one, but nonetheless I really like these two songs because they tell a story. I think it's something that a majority of people can relate too. We're all trying to pursuit happiness when it comes down to it. We all take different approaches/paths to try and get there. 

Here are the lyrics:

THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS: THE 1ST MOVEMENT

(Couldn't find the song online, so here's a YouTube video of the song. Not the best quality, but you get the idea)

In the heat of another busy day he said,
"What on earth am I doing here anyway?
I've spent all my attention on the world and its distractions.
I've no time for reflection.
No, I just go, go, go.
It's just go, go, go."

In the heat of a conversation it was said,
"I've got all these good intentions.
I just don't have the time."
We all wish for more.
And more hours in a day.
But I think it's safe to say.
We just need to breathe and slow down.

Slow down, slow down.
Slow down and ask yourself right now.
Slow down, you're falling asleep in traffic.
Slow down, you're losing your soul.
Slow down, where are you taking yourself now?

I just wanna be happy.
But I can't quench my thirst.
I'm always missing something.
Maybe I just need more.
Or maybe I should just breathe and slow down.

Slow down, slow down.
Slow down and ask yourself right now.
Slow down, you're falling asleep in traffic.
Slow down, you're losing your soul.
Slow down, where are you taking yourself now?

When I fall asleep I dream of happiness.
In numbers and dollar signs.
And when I awake, it's only one prize away.
I've never known anything else.

Slow down, slow down.

Slow down, where are you taking yourself now? 

THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS: THE 2ND MOVEMENT

(YouTube video of the song)

I know, I know, 
I know the secret to your happiness.
Oh I know, I know.
Take a deep breath, there's only one way.
Give all you have away.

Well you've wasted.
You've wasted so much time.
Trying to buy what you can't buy.
(You can't buy happiness)
And if you really wanna live.
I'm gonna have to let it go.
I'm gonna have to give it all.

Oh God it hurts.
But when I count the cost.
It all seems worth it all.
God, it's a fight and I just might.
I might just let it all go.

The only thing that I've been feeding.
Is my American dream.
But it's never satisfied.

We're all overweight and comfortable.
But I saw a need on my big screen TV.
It shook me and questioned my integrity.
And it called me to be more than I'd ever dreamed.

It called me to give my whole life.
Well that's what I'm gonna do.

Gene Autry Museum. Went there to take photos of an exhibit for work. 

Give and Take

I've become lazy lately when it comes to making music. I need to get back into doing it, cause when I do, I usually come up with something new or productive.

Things have been on the above average side. I sure can't complain much about a majority of things. I'm still trying to figure out what's the best route to get to where I want to go when it comes to audio. There are always pros and cons to each direction and I don't know which one is the right one. I also think I've been waiting for opportunities as opposed to seeking them. That needs to change as well.

I'm not really writing about anything new... maybe I should try to make this more interesting! Next time since I'm kind of in a hurry.

I started product photography lately. I took pictures of my Aunt's quilting work, and the following is other Aunt's floral arrangement. I'm pretty happy with how they turned out. There is still room for improvement though.

Awake

I'm not sure what to make of this year so far. It's already April, and it doesn't seem like it's taken any direction- good or bad. I guess it's been neutral. I think I expected things to be different, but everything is just floating on.

I've been able to hang out with friends more the last few weeks, which has been awesome. It's nice to catch a break from working, and just spend time with the people who make your life enjoyable. 

My new lighting kit came in the mail last week. It was such a hassle putting it together! It's finally up and running though. I don't plan on taking it down until I need to though. Haha. The kit has inspired me to start a new photography project. The picture below is my old photography project. This is at least four years old. 

The new project won't be as colorful, and all around pretty different then the one above. I don't think I'll get as many people involved with it though. I've already gotten three people, and I think I'll try for ten. I'll see who I can get in my studio/living room.

Good day!

Best Wishes

For the last several years, one of my New Years resolutions has been to lose weight/get in shape. I failed every year, but I've been doing a pretty good job this year. It's probably because I have a gym membership. I try to go 2-3 times a week, and I know if I don't go, I'd feel guilty wasting money. My schedule has been pretty hectic lately, so I haven't been able to go as often as I'd like. Point is, it's April and I'm still sticking to an exercise/food routine. That's more than I've done in the last several years!

I'm trying to watch what I eat as well. I'm limiting myself to eating at fast food places to a maximum of twice a week, and it's been working. I haven't really been going at all. I'm cutting down on soda, which I've actually been doing for awhile. It sucks that I really like juice, which you think would be healthy, but it apparently has a lot of calories... what a shame. I'm trying to go 1-2 days a week without eating meat. Because I'm busy (and poor), I get lunch from somewhere and save the rest for dinner. It's been a good way to save money and time.

Alright, enough of my eating and exercise habits. Today was a day off, and so is tomorrow. I get three days off this week. What a luxury... Sometimes I don't even know what to do with myself...

I have very mixed feelings about a certain subject. Because of how I felt before, it prevents me from feeling differently about the situation now that circumstances have changed. Well, I do feel differently about the situation, but I'm still very unsure of how to go about it. I don't need to be worrying about this, in fact, I shouldn't unless the time comes to confront it. I can't help the fact that I have such an overactive, curious mind!

 

This was taken back in August 2008.

  

Who Are You Now?

I don't have any subject I'm really interested in talking about. Things are going well. It seems like the rut I was stuck in a few weeks ago lasted forever and isn't that far behind in the rear view mirror. But for the time being, it has passed.

I recently purchased a wide angle lens and a lighting kit. It's nice to have a part time job to help pay for this. I'm hoping this will open doors to be able to do more freelance projects. My parents got me a photography AND audio gig in mid-April. It's very rare that I can mix the two together in one event. I feel like I'm slowly becoming a better photographer. Of course like any 'artist', I'm really picky about my work.

It seems as though I'll be having more visitors in the next coming weeks, which will be nice. I'm excited to see some old, familiar faces and just have fun. I can't lose sight of the fact that it's not all about working. It's not that I'm not serious about my jobs, I'm still a hardworking, ambitious person, but jobs come and go. People come and go to, but people help make your life what it is. Your job isn't ALL you are. It's a part of you, but there's more to life than that. Oh yeah, there's that whole thing about having to make money to survive... blah! All I'm saying is that I'm young and have the rest of my life to work. I need to take advantage of my youth and have fun before it's gone!

Speaking of youth, I took pictures at my cousin's baseball game last Saturday. I hung out with my two cousins, Joseph (10) and Jessica (6) after the game. Jo led us through the woods to find 'coffins' of the people the field was dedicated to. We then played a number of card games, many of which I had forgotten how to play. It was very refreshing to be with them. Seeing kids being kids and having fun. Knowing that they still have their innocence intact unlike us 'adults' or teenagers. I can't believe how big they are now. I remember when they were just babies. I feel so old now!  

   

This Too Shall Pass

It's funny how much changes in a week. I was feeling very down, and thought it might be awhile before I recovered. I can be a pretty private person, but to certain friends, I can vent and ask advice, and feel ten times better after doing so. Whenever I say what's on my mind, it helps me release some of the tension and worry. By no means am I in the clear. I still know that there is someone breathing down my neck, and who knows when that will end, but at least I am not alone. 

I have the next two days off, and this is after working the last 15 straight days. I haven't been this excited in awhile. I hope I can get some stuff done and just relax. I've had to put off doing things I've been meaning to do/finish because I have been insanely busy. 

I want to finish writing and recording some songs. I want to mix some old recordings. I want to go to the driving range and use my awesome golf clubs that I never get to use. I want to finally finish my new website! I want to hang out with my friends. I NEED to go to the gym. Notice that isn't a want to go to the gym! 

I won't be able to accomplish all this in two days, but next week will hopefully not be as hectic. I know I'll at least have Saturday off.

It's 4:11 AM, and I'm tired. I should probably get some rest...

Make It Better

Make It Better- Evan & Jaron

I don't know what's happening to me

I can't remember things I used to believe

I caught myself just the other day

Stealing color from words and leaving them gray

Yeah, I've fallen down a time or two

But no one was looking so I'm not telling you

I've got to make it better, make it alright

Got to find me a ladder to reach the light

Got to move to the exit, single file line

Before the fire spreads to my head and burns my mind

It's been real, but it's time to go home

Time to change back to the clothes that I own

I could use some heavier shoes

To ground me of feelings I don't want to lose

And all this time, I never knew

That it never meant anything to you

Things haven't been going so well. Last week was a complete nightmare, and I'd like to pretend it never happened, but it replays in my head every once in awhile. This post might be a bit ambiguous cause I don't want to go into the details. 

I'm faced with the reality that something that I didn't see coming might happen sooner than I thought. The things that have been going on in my life, one being something that has affected me much more than I thought it would, has had an impact on me. 

One of my flaws is thinking that I can do much more than one should possibly handle at once. Like the time I tried to do three internships and a weekend job. I thought, "Hey, there are 24 hours in a day, I can handle it." What about everything else? It's not all about working. I've lost touch with the things I love to do, and that is a clear sign to me that I might be overworking myself. Or is that just making a sacrifice?

I started to panic about the possibility of this premature event. I started thinking irrationally at one point. My thoughts calmed down the next day, and I told myself that it might be a jab to the face, but it's NOT a knockout. It would be a road block, but the world will still go on, and there will be other chances.

My cousin's dog, Coby. 

The Simple Things That People Over Complicate

There are times when you think your life is a bit tough, but then something gives you some perspective on it all. You then realize that your life is not as hard and complicated compared to others. I don't have a life threatening illnesses. I won't be kicked to the curb or starve if I don't make money (or enough). We all have our own problems, and I know as much as I bitch and moan about mine at times, they are tiny compared to others out there. 

Today, Thursday, is my only day off. Off days are becoming minimal, but at least I am making money at a part time job. The weekend photography job did not schedule me for the rest of the baseball season, so I don't have to do that now. That is one less thing I have to worry about, and I guess also one less way to make money. That's okay because I am going to try harder to get freelance photography jobs. 

I am redesigning my website. I think it'll look a lot better, but it looked better in my head. Haha. Well, I think I'll get to that now.

Until next time.

  

What Happens When The Heart Just Stops

Albums on my current playlist:

Nothing Ever Stays- Progression EP

The Frames- For The Birds

The Last Goodnight- Poison Kiss (I've had this CD for awhile, but I'm revisiting it)

CLEANING. It never ends. You will never win this battle. You leave it alone, it'll get dirty and dusty. You use [it] and it'll get messy and dirty.

After seven months, I have finally decided to organize my room. My Dad put most of my boxes in an unused office in his office building. It removes some of the clutter from my room and our living room which was acting as my storage space. I can now walk on the right side of my room without hitting a box or stepping on something. Hooray.

I decided to bust out my tea lights and candles again. At night, I turn off the lights and light all the candles. It's very relaxing and it smells nice too. I'll take a picture of it soon.

My weekend is going to be busy and tiring.

FRIDAY: 

[12 PM-4 PM] gym, shower, and cleaning

[5 PM-12 AM] Interning

SATURDAY

[5 AM] Wake up to get ready to go to the photography shoot. 

[6 AM] Meet with the crew

[8 AM-12 PM] Photo shoot in Placentia/Yorba Linda

SUNDAY

[9 AM-5 PM] Interning at the studio

I'm just going to stop right there. I'll probably get to bed around 1-1:30, which won't leave me much time to sleep. Here are a few things that bother me: The meeting place is in Sherman Oaks, 10 minutes away from the studio. It feels a bit pointless to me to drive home when it's that close to the studio, but I'm not going to sleep in my car... I usually ask to be scheduled for a shoot that is close to my home, but they didn't have any near me. Okay, understandable. BUT as a substitute she said she put me on the EARLIEST shoot. That does not make much sense to me!! I'll be a walking zombie for the rest of Saturday. The MORNING fun resumes on Sunday when I have the opening shift. I'm not a morning person if you don't know by now...

My schedule is about to get real tight. I'll talk bout that next time. Here's a picture of one of the noisy peacocks that reside in our neighborhood. 

The Burn

Check out the song 'The Burn' by Nothing Ever Stays. This song is really catchy, and I love the drums. Toms are not used enough in songs! 

I think this is the first post NOT written at 1 AM. What can I say? I do my best thinking past midnight.

I'm feeling better about myself and the way things are heading. I can only mope about less-than-spectacular situations for so long. I'm ready to move on and DO things. I was so proactive in 2008, and I lost some of that. It's time to get it back and let my creative juices flow again.

I might take on a part time job. We'll see if that pans out, and if it does, I will only have to get more creative with my time since I won't have as much of it. I'd like to make some money. Money is good...

Today, February 23rd, is my old dog, Rocky's birthday. It's been about 2.5 years since he's been gone. He would've been 13 today. I have two pictures of him on my headboard/night stand, so I see those pictures every night before I go to sleep. It still pains me a bit to see pictures of him knowing he is not here anymore and will never be. Funny how dogs and pets in general can be such a huge part of you. Well, Happy Birthday Rocky. I hope you're living the good life.

 

I Should Mean More

My life revolves around music. I spend a majority of my day listening to it. I'm trying to be involved with it as a profession. I make it. I relate to it. I love it. I live it.

This post title and the last post title are both song titles/lyrics from some of my CDs. I can pretty much find a song to match any of my feelings or mood(s).

I've been battling with myself mentally the last two weeks. It's been a bit frustrating, but every once in awhile you go through some bumps like that. You question what you are doing, why you are doing it, and if it will ever amount to anything in the end. 

Right now I'm doing something that I told myself I wouldn't do because I consider(ed) it meaningless. I used to tell myself I wouldn't do this or that because it's not meaningful. Anyone can do meaningless things. 

Are things really 'meaningless' or do they only appear that way because we think they are? Yes and no. You can never say for sure that things won't turn out a certain way. In all likelihood this situation will not lead to the big picture, but it does mean something, and I do get something out of it. Sometimes I wonder why I'm putting time and effort into it, but if you get something out of it in the end, then you acquire something and it doesn't make it useless after all, now does it?

I still consider getting drunk one of these 'meaningless' things. It's meaningless to me, so I don't care to do it. You drink, kill your liver in the process, and possibly wake up feeling like crap... that does not sound like a good time to me, but then again, that's me. I don't need to drink to have a good time or 'let loose'. I kind of went off on a tangent.

SOOOOOO... that leads me to what I was initially talking about. 'I Should Mean More' is the title of this post. It might possibly be more appropriate if it was 'I Should DO More'. No, interning is not fun. It drags people down. Gives them hope and takes it away at the same time. BUT, it's all part of this 'paying dues' thing we have to do if we want to make it...

Bottom line, I cannot just wait around for the next step. I have to be PROACTIVE. I need to find ways to stay sharp. I need to find ways to network with people... work on projects. Same goes with photography. I might have to do some stuff for free first, but I'm okay with that. I just need to DO more and THINK less. So as soon as I get my schedule worked out, I'm going to work on that. It's the crafty people who make it in this industry, and I got to be just that. I've always been told I'm a creative person, and now I have to put that creativity to work.

Forward progress starts now.

       

Who I Am, Who I'm Not, and Who I Want To Be

The title is a line taken from a song by The Fray, in case it sounded familiar to you. I thought it was very fitting for what I am going to talk about. 

INTERNING

Sometimes I don't know what to make out of the fact that I'm at my fourth internship. I stopped two, which turned out to be permanently, to take a great opportunity. The other one was because I had already done three months, and that was that. I don't regret any of the decisions I've made. I'm still big on trying not to regret decisions I've made in the past because they cannot be changed and have led me to where I am now. I'm actually doing a good job at sticking to that mindset. Yes, things could've turned out differently. Yes, I could have made better decisions perhaps, but what can you do? 

This was my third week at the new internship, and it was definitely not a charm. I made my mistakes, and I'm still thinking about them. I'm hoping the weekend will help put them in the rear view mirror as I don't intend on repeating any of these mistakes again. There is still a slight learning curve, but I've pretty much got the system down. 

I have friends who have jobs at studios back in the Bay, who are actually doing audio stuff (and good for them). Maybe if I stayed up there I would be in the same position. I will never know, but that's okay. Like I said, I don't regret my decisions. I'm set on trying to make it here in LA. When I make it, I know it'll be good. Better than if I had decided to stay up there. Bold statements, I know.

I'm about to make another bold statement in just a little bit. It bothers me when I see people who have 'made it' forget where they've came from. If you make it big (and even if you don't, but especially if you do) DON'T FORGET WHERE YOU CAME FROM. Don't forget about what you had to do to get you to that position. 

If you become a hot shot engineer, don't forget the fact that you were cleaning up after people, picking up their food, cleaning the toilet, scrubbing the floors, etc. If you become an actor, don't forget about all the auditions and rehearsing you had to do before you got that big role. If you become a popular artist, don't forget about all the art classes and all the crap drawing you drew before. Here is my bold statement (bold for me because I don't like assuming I will do something cause you really never know): If I ever get to the point where I make a name for myself, I will not look down upon those who are trying to make it just like I am now. I won't forget where I came from.

   

It's All In Your Head

My week started off on an interesting note. This happened Monday night, and here's another article on it.

I was on a food run on Ventura Blvd. around 8 PM, and on my way back I saw two cop cars and a helicopter with its searchlight on. I said, "Oh snap! They're looking for someone." Two hours passed and I started talking to one of the front desk girls about what I saw, and mentioned that it was very odd. Thirty/forty minutes later I was sent on a run to Burbank. While driving west on the 134, I saw white dots in the sky from a distance. I thought they were helicopters, but thought it was very strange since there where about five lined up in a row. 

I turned onto the small residential street to get to the back alley where the parking lot is located. There were a number of people walking and cars pulling in, and I'm wondering what the heck is going on, but at the same time I'm worried about getting the food back on time. I get back into the studio and see four other staff members staring at the TV. There's a car chase going on. Well, there was a car chase going on, and now the guy has stopped.

Why was this so interesting? Because the stand still was right down the street from the studio.

 

So it all makes sense... that's why there were five helicopters circling around near the studio and why there are people running in the otherwise empty parking lot. The guy was in his Bentley stopped right next to that car dealership you see on the right. The marker indicates where the studio is. If that guy was in a Ford Escape or something like that, people wouldn't have made such a big deal about it. 

It didn't occur to me that on my way back from the first food run around 8 PM is when the chase started, so I saw the beginning of it. I didn't get to go outside to see all the madness, but whatever. The guy ended up shooting himself in the head. It's a bit ironic that on my way back from the second run, I passed by the hospital he was later taken to.

This all brings me to question why someone would do this. Apparently he was about to be arrested, and he was distressed about losing his business. Why would he want to end his life and make a spectacle out of it? How did he get to the point where he thought everything was unfixable, so therefore wanting to end it all? When did he lose all hope in everything?

I'm very intrigued by how people think. When referring to goals we want to achieve, things we want to do, and places we want to see, we often say 'some day I'll do it'. Obviously there are some factors that play into this like time and money, but if those two things are not a factor, what stops us from doing that thing NOW. What turns an idea into reality? When do we tell ourselves that we will stop thinking and start doing? 

I often spend time thinking about those questions. I'm guilty of doing that as well, but if we always say we'll do this or that 'someday', we'll keep putting it off until 'someday' it's too late to do it. Then what happens? We regret the fact that we never did it. There are a ton of things in the world I'd like to do. One of my biggest fears is that I won't get to do them all. Well, that's really only something time will tell.

Yes, I Still Buy CDs.

That is a picture of my CD collection since August 2008, when I moved back home. That would be 33 CDs. The rest of my collection is in boxes, so when I eventually get more, they will go in there as well. Yes, I've been back 6.5 months and I'm STILL living out of boxes. I refuse to settle.

Now, if you asked me what type of music I listen to, I'd be lying if I said, "I listen to everything". What do I listen to? Mainly different forms of rock, but I like pop, R&B, country, and classical. Growing up, I first listened to a lot of R&B and pop. I always liked rock, but let's just say I grew up in the teeny bopper boy band era. 

However, I am NOT the type of person who will disregard a song because I don't like the artist or the genre. Just because I don't usually listen to hip hop or rap doesn't mean I won't like a song under that category. If it sounds good, it sounds good!

I thought I'd share my takes on some of the most recent albums I've purchased. There are multiple CDs from some artists.

 

MOGWAI- EP + 6

I received four Mogwai CDs for Christmas since they were on my list. This EP made me grow even more fond of them. To me, they have a distinct style. They don't have a lot of vocals, but when they do, it's very scattered and seems to go with the flow. 

Best songs on the CD:

1. Superheroes Of BMX (favorite)

2. Xmas Steps (love the bass build up somewhere after the 3 minute mark)

3. Small Children In The Background

4. Stanley Kubrick

MOGWAI- Rock Action

This is also a good album. There are two songs that really stick out to me: Take Me Somewhere Nice and Dial:Revenge.

SNOW PATROL- A Hundred Million Stars

I love this album. I hadn't really looked into Snow Patrol until this album. Boy, was I happy I did. From beginning to end, it's a strong album. It ends with a 16+ minute song, 'The Lightning Strike', which is like 3 songs in 1. It's a nice way to end the album. 'If There's A Rocket Tie Me To It' and 'Crack The Shutters' are a good way to start the album off. 

Best songs:

1. If There's A Rocket Tie Me To It

2. Crack The Shutters

3. Lifeboats (love the 'funkiness' of the song'

4. The Golden Floor (gotta love the clapping)

5. Set Down Your Glass (Favorite song on the album. This song is beautiful, and it puts me at ease)

6. The Lightning Strike

SNOW PATROL- Eyes Open

I got this CD after I got 'A Hundred Million Stars' even though it was released before it. The album is very much like their newest one in terms of album structure. A strong beginning and end, anchored by some good songs in the middle. I know 'Chasing Cars' was very popular when it came out, but I didn't listen to it much, and that's probably why I really like it now.

Best Songs:

1. You're All I Have (good opener)

2. Hands Open

3. Chasing Cars

4. Shut Your Eyes

5. You Could Be Happy (great lyrics, simple, elegant sound)

6. Headlights On Dark Roads (I absolutely love the intro)

7. Open Your Eyes

KILLSWITCH ENGAGE- As Daylight Dies

Now, I'm not a huge metal person, but I like KSE. I can take screaming, but there's got to be singing as well, and they have both. They've got some really catchy choruses on this album. I haven't established a favorite song though.

Best Songs:

1. This Is Absolution

2. The Arms Of Sorrow

3. My Curse

4. Eye Of The Storm

5. Break The Silence

6. Desperate Times

7. Holy Diver

KILLSWITCH ENGAGE- The End Of Heartache

The title track is what got me interested in them. I didn't really even know it was metal when I first heard it. To tell you the truth, I haven't listened to it much yet. I just thought I'd share with you the fact that I got it!

ONCE Soundtrack

When I saw the movie, after I heard the second song, I knew I wanted the soundtrack. 'Falling Slowly' has to be one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard. Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová are like magic together musically! There is no doubt you can feel their emotion in their music. 

Best Songs:

1. Falling Slowly (favorite)

2. When Your Mind's Made Up

3. Lies

4. The Hill (Beautiful, kind of eerie, and a little heartbreaking all at the same time)

5. Leave

6. All The Way Down

THE FRAMES- Burn The Maps

The Once soundtrack inspired me to look into Glen Hansard's regular band. This is a good album. I feel that the song 'Happy' which opens the album up is not traditionally a song you'd have at the beginning, but I like this song. It's a very eerie sounding song. Another eerie sounding song is 'A Caution To The Birds'. I haven't established a favorite on this album either. All the songs are pretty good.

Best songs:

1. Happy

2. Finally (I really like the chorus)

3. Trying

4. Fake (unlike the other songs, but it's a good one)

5. Suffer In Silence

6. Locusts (I really like the chorus in this song too)

THE FRAY- The Fray

I don't like listening to singles because I think they'll wear me out. I am very much so still an album person. I'll listen to the album all the way through even though I don't like some songs as much. I might discover something new about that song that I didn't know before. I mention that because I only heard 'You Found Me' a max of three times before the CD came out, and I still like it.

Best songs:

1. Syndicate (my favorite. Everything about this song catches my attention)

2. Absolute (Catchy chorus, which the Fray seems to be very good at)

3. You Found Me

4. Never Say Never

5. Enough For Now (I like the verses better than the choruses)

6. Happiness (great lyrics)

CAROLINA LIAR- Coming To Terms

This is a very good debut album. 'I'm Not Over' and 'Coming To Terms' are two good songs to start off the CD. It has some good songs in the middle, and has a strong end too. 'Show Me What I'm Looking For' was the song that caught my attention on the radio.

Best songs:

1. Coming To Terms

2. Show Me What I'm Looking For

3. California Bound

4. Done Stealin'

5. Beautiful World (Hands down my favorite. It's a very beautifully written song, no pun intended)

6. When You Are Near

You Could Be Happy

It rained REALLY hard today in LA. I like the rain. I don't like the hot, sunshine in February. It's February! Can we get some 'winter' weather please?

I work in North Hollywood/Universal City, and the streets were terrible. The right lane was pretty much useless. It was filled with massive amounts of water. To top it off, I had to go on nine runs that day. 

Not sure what it is about the rain, but it makes me think a bit deeper about things. It made me think about the homeless person who resides in front of the two unused doors in the 'front' side of the studio. How long has he been there? Is he getting splashed by all the water when the cars drive in the right lane? 

I noticed a trend among three of the last four albums I bought. They all had a song on their album with the word 'happy' in the title. Naturally, this made to think about happiness, and what each of them were saying about this very subject. Three very different songs about the same thing supposedly.

Snow Patrol- You Could Be Happy

You could be happy and I won't know

But you weren't happy the day I watched you go

And all the things that I wished I had not said

Are played in loops 'til it's madness in my head

Is it too late to remind you how we were

But not our last days of silent screaming blur

Most of what I remember makes me sure

I should have stopped you from walking out the door

You could be happy, I hope you are

You made me happier than I'd been by far

Somehow everything I own smells of you

And for the tiniest moments it's all not true

Do the things that you always wanted to 

Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do

More than anything I want to see you girl

Take a glorious bite out of the whole world

You should be happy no matter what

Listen to the song through a video slideshow someone made. It's overall a simple sounding song. The glockenspiel drives it for most of the song (more songs should have glockenspiels in it, in my opinion). With those lyrics, the song doesn't need to be overly complicated. Sometimes if you really care/love someone, you have to know when to let them go, and this songs amplifies that.

The Frames- Happy

Come help me out I'm sick from the fight

From inserting a laugh where there's none

Show me where this joke got tired

Tell me you know cause I'm slow catching on...

You're trying to break me down with your tuneless song

That kept me up all night

Take me to the fair where the lifeless singers

Will let you ride up beside them sometimes

And you're putting a line

Where there should not be a line

And your building divides...

Come cut me out I got caught in the wire

From believing the filtering downs

Show me where the stakes got higher

Just goes to show how slow we've become

And you're putting a line

Where there should not be a line

And your building divides

And putting a line

Why are you building divides

Is it some failing in your life.

Listen and watch a live version of the song here. The song has a very dark feel to it. Unlike the other two 'happy' songs, there is no mention of the word happy in the song. It's quite the opposite, which is somewhat ironic. 

The Fray- Happiness

Happiness is just outside my window

I thought it'd crash blowing eighty miles an hour

But happiness is a little more like knocking

On your door, you just let it in

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow

Let it be, you can't make it come or go

But you are gone, not for good but for now

And gone for now feels a lot like gone for good

Happiness is a firecracker sitting on my headboard

Happiness was never mine to hold

Careful child, light the fuse and get away

'Cause happiness throws a shower of sparks

Happiness damn near destroys you

Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor

So you tell yourself that's enough for now

But happiness has a violent roar

Happiness it's like the old man told me

Look for it and you'll never find it all

But let it go, live your life and leave it

Then one day you'll wake up and find she'll be home

Listen to the song here. I love the metaphors in this song. It talks about the different forms or happiness, and how we think we know what it is, but it could be something else. I remember being told that nothing is permanent. Not the bad, or the good. Happiness comes and goes, but just because it's gone doesn't mean that it won't come back. 

It's actually really hard for me to explain music. Music more than anything in the world is almost indescribable. It's just a feeling I get, and I can't put that into words. That's why I am trying to break through in the music industry. Music is a happiness that I want to have in all aspects of my life. There is no such thing as too much music. 

All those songs made me think about my level of happiness lately. For the most part, I am happy. I have been happier, but where I'm at isn't bad. It could always be a lot worse, and I'm thankful to have what I have now. Nothing is perfect, there could always be more, but I guess it's all on how you look at things too. I'm looking on the upside.    

Closing picture: